NEWS: Lab-Grown Penises Coming Soon

Though it sounds like something straight out of science fiction, lab-grown cocks are soon going to become a reality. Human trials of lab-grown penises may be coming (wink wink) in the next 4 to 5 years due to funding from the Armed Forces Institute of Regenerative Medicine. This could revolutionize the treatment of men with congenital abnormalities, penile cancer, and erectile dysfunction as well as those who lost their genitals through injury. A similar treatment has already worked for women, with 4 successful lab-grown pussy’s already implanted!best_phone_sex_niteflirt_lab_penis

Researchers made headlines in 2009 for growing penile erectile tissue in a lab and building a “functional engineered solid organ” for rabbits. And now they are making progress on a human version. Dr. James Yoo, a researcher on the effort, describes it like this: “Think of it like a building. If you remove all the furniture and the people, you’re still left with the main structure of the building. Then you replace the tenants with new ones. That’s the whole idea. It’s just that the building is a penis and the tenants are cells.” Basically, growing a penis works by relying on a donated organ that is stripped down to its basic structural cells, which then act like a “scaffold” on which cells taken from the patient are grown until it’s developed enough to be surgically attached. Science is amazing!

We aren’t brilliant scientists in a fancy lab, but we know a thing or two about helping cocks to grow!

 

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NEWS: Britain censorship laws crack down on BDSM porn

iStock_000024548003XSmallFetish porn producers in Britain are yelling “bloody hell!” this week after a new set of censorship laws aimed at BDSM internet porn. And the Brits who want to get their rocks off to some good old fashioned kinky BDSM aren’t happy about it either. That’s right, the UK prudes have just banned a variety of sex acts from porn videos made in the UK, most of which are BDSM related. As Frankie Mullin at Vice explains, “That means that British pornography producers will no longer be able to offer content online that couldn’t be bought in a sex shop.”

Basically, the censorship laws say that all streaming content must not contain anything that might corrupt the morals of impressionable, under 18 people—and to the people who passed these laws, that mostly means fetish, BDSM porn. Some of the specially restricted BDSM porn includes: caning, spanking, aggressive whipping, penetration by any object “associated with violence,” physical or verbal abuse, urolangia (i.e., “water sports”), strangulation, and, bizarrely, facesitting. The last one just seems excessively prudish, and sexist—they also banned female ejaculation and fisting. These new rules just seem like another way to censor perfectly consensual BDSM acts and further stigmatize a kinky niche sex market.

We say to British BDSM censorship: Bollocks to that! Want to exercise your freedom to be kinky with us? We love all things BDSM!

 

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NEWS: 4th Annual Air Sex Competition

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_airsexThe Air Sex Competition, which started as an air guitar parody competition several years ago, has really come (pun intended!) into its own with some of best dry humpers, silent orgasm and imaginary blow-job aficionados out there. The 4th annual competition, hosted by comedian Chris Trew, brought the audience to its knees with its performers’ all-out, sexually electric yet comedic take on simulated sex. Competitors can perform any act from foreplay, to sex-toy masturbation, to a straight up fuck-fest, all before a packed audience and a panel of judges, many of whom are porn stars. The rules are simple: there must be an imaginary sex-partner on stage, and the orgasm must be simulated; the rest is up to the performer.

Judge Chris Trew explains the appeal of air-sex, and why it’s an art form on a different, higher level than stripping: “A lot of it is about commitment. You gotta get into that zone, that flow-zone that athletes get into.” And it really is all about the performance, comedic appeal, and sexual energy. Last year, Jam Out With My Clam Out stole the show with her innovative act that had her donning fake rubber tits and hair curlers, trying to revive her dead husband by ripping out her fake teeth and going to town on his cock!

We always respect when an artist gives it everything she has and commits 100% to her performance. Want a taste of that powerful sexual energy yourself? Here at Niteflirt, we are artists in our own right!

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NEWS: Gamers can now have first-person sex in new GTA

The new version of Grand Theft Auto V allows you to experience driving stolen cars, shooting people, and now, with its first-person mode, having sex with prostitutes. As if GTA isn’t visceral and boundary-pushing enough, you can now fuck in the game in all the hardcore ways you’d expect. The sex scenes themselves aren’t terribly graphic, but the dialog and sex-sounds are reminiscent of something straight out of a very hot porno—or actually getting your freak on in real life! best_phone_sex_niteflirt_grand_theft_auto

In the video Rockstar made (below), the driver picks up a prostitute and takes her into a dark alley. Then she asks, “What are you craving baby?” and proceeds to suck his cock. She says things like, “Oh shit. I love the taste of pre-cum” while slurping on his dick and moaning, “I want to swallow all of your cum.” Then they fuck. She climbs on top and says things like, “I’m so wet for you”; “you like my titties in your face while I’m riding you?”; “my clit is throbbing for you right now.” And the first-person POV definitely makes you feel like you’re in an interactive porn.

We’re not gonna lie—that video game got us pretty hot for the real thing! Come and experience the joys of the first-person right here with us!

 

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NFNEWS: Fleshlight Launchpad

There are many many porn enthusiasts out there. And just as many sex toy enthusiasts. So what if we told you that there’s now a way to marry your love of porn with your love of sex toys, in a more interactive way than just getting off with both? The makers of the popular men’s sex toy, Fleshlight, have just figured out a way to do just that.best_phone_sex_niteflirt_fleshlight_launchpad

Introducing the Fleshlight Launchpad, the sex toy that clicks in to your Ipad, allowing you to literally fuck the porn you’re watching on the screen. It looks like a flashlight, with a soft, pussy-like sleeve to slip your cock in. Then just click it in to your tablet, slip your dick securely in, and enjoy whatever you’re watching. It only costs $24.95, and it’s also great for fucking your partner long-distance, since you can use the camera on your Ipad to watch each other get down and dirty.

Looking for some sexy, interactive fun? We are always game for some naughty play!

 

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NEWS: Woman Plays Symphony With Breasts

The woman in the video steps in front of the camera wearing a man’s gray coat and an androgynous silk scarf. She has funky short silver hair with purple streaks. She is expressionless, and looks extremely serious and focused. Then she removes her oversized coat and scarf to reveal big beautiful tits barely covered with a mini string bikini, and many tattoos. She crosses her arms, and the symphony begins.

What comes next is simply hypnotic—and hot! She flexes her ample breasts perfectly in time to Mozart’s “Eine Kleine Nachtmusik” (you really have to see it to believe it)! Sara X is a model, blogger, and “tall, tattooed weirdo with an offbeat sense of humor.” She says the video isn’t “fake or a trick, but my boobs are…no strings attached just plenty of silicone.” Those are some truly gifted fake boobs!

In the mood to make some beautiful music with us? Our talents in bed rival Mozart’s on piano!

 

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NEWS: Porn Actress Rebecca More’s UK Sex Tour

In what’s being dubbed the “X Factor of Sex,” thousands of horny porn fans are entering a contest to #DoRebecca, in which the lucky winners will get the chance to, well, “do” Rebecca More in a van for her sex tour. The busty porn star who goes by “UK MILF” is cruising the British countyside for her reality tour, picking up dozens of strangers in her van and fucking them in the back of it. More is filming the sex marathon for Television X, the popular UK adult film network known for its Downton Abbey porn spoof, Down on Abbey.best_phone_sex_niteflirt_rebecca_more

Anyone can apply to the contest or follow her on Twitter for hot, naughty updates about her sex tour. And an adult entertainment representative said, “Whether you are a builder, butcher, student, office worker, sex mad sports men or a layabout, it doesn’t matter, all you need to do is apply and you can Do Rebecca.” While politicians are scandalized by the porn star getting x-rated in their towns, the 20 locals who have had the chance to fuck Rebecca in her van have all said they greatly enjoyed the experience. A man who goes by the nickname “King Body Art” and claims to have the most tattoos in England, fucked Rebecca on top of the van and tweeted that it was “a fun day.” And pro rugby player Greg Jacob said it was “just a bit of fun.”

Want to go on a wild ride with us? We don’t have a sex van, but we’re confident we can take you on a fun and exciting adventure!

 

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NEWS: Couple Fucking in the Ocean Gets Stuck Together

Oh, the pleasures of spontaneous sex in risky places. Many horny couples have enjoyed the thrills and slight danger of joining the mile high club, fucking outdoors, and, of course, what could be sexier than fucking in the ocean as rhythmic, undulating waves lap two humping bodies? But few consider other risks than getting caught (or arrested) when deciding to go at it in public, and one frisky couple who fucked at a mostly empty beach off the Italian coast could never have guessed what the consequences would be. best_phone_sex_niteflirt_mermaids

The two found themselves “stuck together” mid-fuck, apparently because of the suction of the water. They had to drag their entwined bodies out of the water and up to the shore where they flagged down a woman for help. The sympathetic woman covered them with a towel (awkward much?) and brought back a doctor to un-stick them. But when the doctor couldn’t separate them, they needed to be brought to the emergency room where the woman was given an injection used for pregnant women to dilate their uterus, and voila, the key finally slipped out of the lock!

Talk about hardcore sex; that is some dangerous fucking! In the mood for some hot, risky fun? We promise all the fun and excitement you can handle!

 

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NEWS: 2014 Bad Sex in Fiction Awards

The Bad Sex in Fiction Awards, which has been a thing for the past two decades, proves that even good writers can write some truly terrible sex scenes. The notorious award, presented by the Literary Review, says its aim is to “draw attention to poorly written, perfunctory or redundant passages of sexual description in modern fiction…” And you will seriously not believe how bad the passages are, and, ironically, how great the writers: the nominees this year include a Pulitzer prize winner, this year’s Man Booker Prize winner, and a recurring favorite for the Nobel Prize! Here are some highlights from the prize that every prose writer dreads: best_phone_sex_niteflirt_contracts

  1. Desert God by Wilbur Smith
    “Her body was hairless. Her pudenda were also entirely devoid of hair. The tips of her inner lips protruded shyly from the vertical cleft. The sweet dew of feminine arousal glistened upon them.”
  2. DD-MM-YY’ in Things to Make and Break by May-Lan Tan
    “When I’m about to come, I flip her onto her back and take off her underwear. I roll her nipple on my tongue and rub her clit with my thumb until her lips get slippery. I glide my middle finger in and out, then fold her legs up and push in. God. It’s like sticking your cock into the sun.”
  3. The Hormone Factory by Saskia Goldschmidt
    “I unbuttoned my pants, pushing them down past my hips, and my beast, finally released from its cage, sprang up wildly. I started inching my way back up, continuing to stimulate her manually, until the beast found its way in…she was as hot as boiling water in a distillation flask…”
  4. Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage by Haruki Murakami (!)
    “Their pubic hair was as wet as a rain forest. Their breath mingled with his, becoming one, like currents from far away, secretly overlapping at the dark bottom of the sea….These insistent caresses continued until Tsukuru was inside the vagina of one of the girls. It was Shiro. She straddled him, took hold of his rigid, erect penis, and deftly guided it inside her. His penis found its way with no resistance, as if swallowed up into an airless vacuum.”

And we’ll leave you with this gem from The Lemon Grove by Helen Walsh: “Then he steps into her, furious. And when it hits her, it slams her hard and fast, as life once had.”

Wow. That is some truly awfully written sex. I think we can probably do better than that—want us to talk dirty to you? We promise that you’ll “became aware of places in [you] that could only have been concealed there by a god with a sense of humour.” Whatever that means.

 

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NEWS: International Clitoris Awareness Week

Clitoris Awareness Week is a 7-day celebration organized by the non-profit, Clitoraid, which seeks to pay homage to “a magnificent organ” in order to “give it the attention it deserves.” Amen to that! The group’s reasoning is that whenever there’s an “awareness day,” it makes subjects such as loving the clit easier for people to talk about. best_phone_sex_niteflirt_bedposted

Some people are really getting into the spirit: in Chicago, one Clitoraid follower walked around the city in a giant suit that looked like a pussy! And in Miami, members will create a big, beautiful pussy sand-castle right on South Beach. Coincidentally, Clit Awareness Week falls in the same month as National Masturbation Day. How appropriate: self-love should never get shafted, but at least we have a whole month to celebrate!

Here at Niteflirt, we think every day should be a celebration of the clit! Want to help us get into the spirit? We know we could use a helping hand!

 

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