You ever see a post so funny that you actually spit your drink out? Well, we’ve got some good ones for you. Just make sure your laptop is appropriately protected!
- “Bad things to say when you nut: whoopsie-doo, here comes the goo.” Or: a shot of goo from me to you!
- “‘Do you moan or cuss?’‘Depends how good the food is but usually both.’” Food porn!
- “Why is Santa’s sack so big? Because he only comes once a year.” Ooh, Santa baby!
- “I got birth control so I can stop being my boyfriend’s Toaster Strudel and start being his Twinkie.” Both are delicious!
- “It’s kinda funny how when you get older you start to enjoy the things you hated as a kid like taking naps and getting spanked.” The second one was kind of unexpected, but no one is disagreeing.
- “‘Is having a penis fun?’‘It has its ups and downs.’”Sometimes it’s a little hard.’‘It’s a pain in the ass.’” Come on, guys!
- “Blowing a dandelion is basically you helping a weed ejaculate.” Is that why it’s so joyful?
Looking for something risque? We can make you spit your drink out right on NiteFlirt!
Check out more inappropriate sex jokes: https://www.buzzfeed.com/