Pornhub Offers 110 Gallons Of Lube To Philadelphia Eagles

Copy-of-Stripper_on_a_Pole_svgIt seems Pornhub has a solution for the Philadelphia Eagles’ problem with deranged football fans climbing the city poles. After Crisco failed when the Eagles beat the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC championship, Pornhub offered 110 gallons of lube to liberally apply to Philadelphia’s light poles for the Super Bowl. Pornhub tweeted this to the Philadelphia police force: “@PhillyPolice heard that you may be looking for an alternative to @Crisco for greasing up the poles this weekend – can we interest you in a few barrels of Pornhub lube?”

The lube might be a better alternative than Crisco for deterring crazed fans, who city officials fear could get seriously injured from climbing the light poles. Unfortunately, fans saw the Crisco as more of a challenge than a safety precaution: “The fact that we were greasing them doesn’t mean we were daring people to climb them,” Sgt. Eric Gripp, a police spokesman, told Philly.com. “It’s the exact opposite.” City officials haven’t responded to Pornhub’s generous offer, but they’re reportedly now using gear oil instead of Crisco. Get it together, Philly—everyone knows lube gets the job done!

Looking for something exciting to climb? We know a thing or two about greasing up poles on NiteFlirt!

Check out more about Pornhub offering the Eagles lube: https://www.dailydot.com/unclick/pornhub-lube-philadelphia/

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