NEWS: Butt Plug Art Installation in Paris, Unplugged

Sculpture resembling sex toy in ParisA controversial art installation inspired by a butt plug and Christmas tree has been vandalized in Paris. Paul McCarthy, the American artist who created the piece and is known for his risqué work, erected the large inflatable sculpture in Place Vendôme for the FIAC contemporary art fair. The giant sex toy has sparked outrage from Parisians since it was placed in the historic square, and on Saturday vandals cut the cables supporting the piece, leaving the artwork slumped on the pavement.

The artist said he was shocked at the outraged and angry reception to his work, since Paris is known for its relaxed, progressive attitude towards sex. One man was so upset that he attacked McCarthy, slapping him in the face several times and yelling that his work had no place in the square, before running away. The mayor of Paris, Anne Hidalgo, supports the art, saying that these attacks essentially “attack artistic freedom,” and that “art has its place in our streets.”

Geez, prudish Parisians. Have a sense of humor, why don’t you? We don’t know about Paris, but your butt plugs and other sex toys will never be persecuted here! We love all forms of artistic expression—especially sexy ones!

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NEWS: Drone Boning: First-Ever Aerial View Porn

Drone Boning, the new video produced by Ghost+Cow, mesmerizes with its stunning aerial shots. All the footage was captured from the skies, arresting viewers with beautiful, breath-taking landscapes: mountains at sunset, a dramatic, crashing ocean, winding coastal highways, endless rows of vines in an orchard. But then the video takes a turn from the awe-inspiring to the erotic.

Suddenly the camera pans dramatically over the long rows of vines to a couple passionately fucking from above. Then, way up high on a autumnal cliff, a woman getting fucked from behind as she gives head to a sexy red-head. And on the winding, scenic highway: a car pulled over to the side of the road, a woman bent over the hood with a man fucking her doggie style. Talk about breath-taking—this aerial porn really has it all!

You don’t need a drone to take you to exotic places—we can take your breath away right here!

 

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Katy, You’re The Boss

By “KatyStressRelief”best_phone_sex_niteflirt_katystressrelief2

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After years of living in corporate America, I had many opportunities to fantasize about various employees, vendors and co-workers. I never pursued these fantasies while under the employee of the company, but if I ran into those folks now, I would nail them in a heart beat.

There were many late nights spent working with these male co-workers and employees. Some called me Boss and others called me Bitch, and I answered to both. I remember one night very clearly as I was especially horny and tense. One of my staff was working so hard to meet a deadline and I knew we were asking him for the impossible, but he was giving it his all. I was working side by side with him and over the evening I watched the way his hands moved and the veins in his forearms grew. I studied his body and the way the muscles in his thighs tightened as he moved. Lucky for me I wore a black skirt that day and a jacket. The wetness between my legs was more like a waterfall. Lucky for my employee, he made the deadline.

While we were waiting for files to transfer, we went to the balcony for some fresh air. I wanted so badly to get him naked and using those hands to please me. As we stood there, my mind began to wander. This was what I saw:

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_katystressreliefHe was finishing up his work but instead of having on jeans and button-down, he was wearing rags that barely covered his manly parts. I’m standing behind him wearing my suit – tailored and expensive. My top is unbuttoned to show my purple (royal color) bra. My skirt is slit to my hip allowing peeks at my matching garter. My stockings are silk and smooth across my soft skin. He turns as he finishes his task. Eyes downcast, he says “I have finished. How can I serve you next?” My fingers tighten on the crop I have been holding. Smiling sweetly, I respond, “As you have worked so hard, I think you deserve to be rewarded. Get your sheet, take your offensive clothing off and lay in the floor.”

In my mind, his face would light up and he would quickly comply. Standing over his face, I lowered my ass down to his mouth. The feel of his tongue licking and probing at my asshole felt incredible. The more I enjoyed the lower on his face my ass settled taking away his breath. Watching his body fight to get free as his mouth continued to serve my desires. I lift up just enough for him to catch a quick breath and then back down. His cock growing harder as I teased him and controlled his breathing. Shifting back, I pushed my pussy down on his lips. The feeling of his tongue sliding between my wet pussy lips demanded I take more. Grinding my pussy against his face as he licked and sucked, he pushed me closer to orgasm. Building inside me, the muscles clinching tighter and my control slipping. His lips wrapped around my clit sucking it like a cock. I exploded. Squirt shooting from my pussy as he opened his mouth to drink. Over and over, he drank and wore my cum that night.

That night should have ended with him going home with my squirt still drying on his skin but instead he left with his computer case and feeling overworked and under-appreciated. Like most corporate non-management employees.

I like my version better.

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NEWS: Bob’s Burgers Porn Parody: Bob’s Boners

WoodRocket, the adult entertainment company behind such porn parodies as Doctor Whore, SpongeKnob SquareNuts, and the Simpsons XXX, have now added a Bob’s Burgers porn parody to their collection: Bob’s Boners. The storyline is actually pretty believable for the show, and the characters, Sexxxy Bob and Sexxxy Linda, do very good impressions. (Warning: you’ll never be able to watch the show again without picturing Bob’s cum-face).

“Adult Exotic Con Biz Show” is coming to town and Sexxxy Bob and Linda are trying to come up with a punny, naughty burger-of-the-day (they land on “Sheep Throat”—a burger that is 100% lamb). Then Sexxxy Bob and Linda stumble upon Tina’s erotic fan fiction, which involves some kinky sex with Jimmy Jr. and a zombie (that is so Tina!). So Bob and Linda go at it, fucking on the retro countertops in a variety of hot positions with Linda yelling, “Fucking make me do stuff!” But the best is the extended blow-job scene: after Linda swallows Bob’s “special sauce” she says, “It’s a little salty, but it’s good!”

In the immortal words of Linda Belcher: All Riiiight! Hungry for our special of the day? We promise you’ll leave satisfied!

Check out the trailer here:

 

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NEWS: Happy Couple Has Sex Doll Threesomes

Dave Hockey and Shawna Bigelow have found a seemingly perfect way to indulge their kinks without all the messy emotional entanglements that often follow: have threesomes with dolls! In fact, before Dave met Shawna, he thought he’d never find a woman who was accepting of his sex doll fetish. But Shawna quickly got into it, at first wearing the doll’s wigs during fucking and later inviting her man’s “lady friends” to join them in the bedroom. Now the couple enjoys regular threesomes with one of Dave’s four life-sized dolls. Here’s what they both say about their kinky arrangement:

Shawna says she likes it because “it is kind of like a threesome without anyone getting hurt.” Though she admits to sometimes getting jealous of the dolls’ “perfect bodies.” Dave likes it because “having a threesome with a doll is safer; there is no emotional entanglement.” Shawna now has her very own sex doll, Terry, who has three custom-made cocks that she can switch up depending on her mood. The couple are speaking publicly about their fondness for sex dolls to dispel stereotypes that only creepy, lonely dudes like them—women like to fuck them too!

While this seems like a cool idea for couples who want to experiment with a ménage à trois but don’t want any of the jealousy, we should add that Dave and Shawna have spent a whopping $30,000 on their sexy bedmates. We here at Niteflirt are a much more reasonable alternative for indulging your naughty kinks!

 

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NEWS: The Bigger The Belly, The Better The Lover

Science has finally explained why sexy ladies adore the strange allure of a big-bellied lover. Think of all the gorgeous women Tony Soprano fucked, not to mention the legions of hot porn stars who’ve gotten x-rated with Ron Jeremy. Now a new study proves what we’ve always known all along: a big belly on a man makes for a better lover, at least when it comes to sexual stamina. 525497_337943076323590_1976492139_n

A year long study at Erciyes University in Turkey looked at the correlation between body mass index (BMI) and male sexual performance. They found that men with big bellies lasted an incredible five minutes (!) longer in bed than thinner men. Researchers determined that men with a higher BMI (i.e., men with big bellies) lasted an average of 7.3 minutes during sex, while slimmer men only lasted about 2 minutes. They also found that thin men were more likely to prematurely ejaculate—wah wah wah. The reason for the drastically higher sexual endurance has to do with estradiol, a hormone associated with more belly fat that helps to inhibit orgasm.

When it comes to good fucking, apparently fat is the new thin! Hankering for a prolonged fuck-fest? Fat or thin, we’re always in the mood!

 

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NEWS: 15 minutes is all it Takes for Better Sex

best_phone_sex_niteflirt_sexhoursYou may have put a lot of effort into the romantic gestures that lead up to getting laid: flowers, a nice dinner, dim lighting and sexy music. And if you’re in a long term relationship, you’ve probably put a lot of effort into spicing up the actual sex, with trips to the adult store, role play, etc. But what if we told you that all it takes for better, more satisfying sex is 15 mins. of your time immediately after the fucking? Science shows that if you want to leave a lasting impression, the cool down period after sex may be the most important factor. That’s right, we’re talking about cuddling.

According to a few new studies in the Archives of Sexual Behavior journal, the “duration of post sex affection was associated with higher sexual satisfaction and, in turn, higher relationship satisfaction.” So, as it turns out, the post-fucking period is the most critical time for promoting satisfaction and intimacy with your partner. The studies show that couples who spent just a little time luxuriating in each other after love-making were happier, more satisfied with their relationship and with the sex, and more likely to want to go at again more often.

Big spoon or little spoon, take your pick! We are all about satisfying fucking—want to cuddle up with us? We are always down!

 

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NEWS: Swinging For Christ

A pair of devout Christians have found a rather unorthodox way of spreading God’s word—through swapping sex partners and Bible verses! The couple, Cristy and Dean Parave, explain that swinging started as a lifestyle, but became a way for them to marry their two passions: religion and fucking other couples. They strongly believe that this is “God’s plan,” and that swinging is the best way of converting (or seducing?) others swingers to Christianity. Holy promiscuity!

“The Bible says ‘Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife.’ But what if your neighbor wants you to?” asks a fellow swinger and believer. The couple feels that the Bible doesn’t say anything about swinging, and as a married couple, if you both agree to it, then it’s okay. And if it’s not? “I guess we’ll find that out on Judgement Day,” Cristy says. But for now, they believe that through swinging and spreading the gospel, they we can do good instead of just have fun. “I’m getting to people who would probably never even visit a church,” Dean explains. They plan to keep going until God tells them to stop. But until that day comes, they’re going to keep “helping” as many people as they can—through making them cum!

Sinners getting to sinners through swinging. Amen to that! In the mood for some wild action? We know we can make you cry out to the good lord!

 

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NEWS: Hot Buns: Denmark Restaurant Combines Food and Sex

Remember the days of getting a toy inside your happy meal? Well, a Denmark restaurant just upped the ante with their special: burger, fries, and a sex toy! Hot Buns, a Danish Gastropub famous for their juicy burgers (or is it for their waitresses?), is the first ever restaurant to combine food and sex. Here’s the deets:best_phone_sex_niteflirt_girls_eating

Hot Buns After Dark is a burger, fry, and sex shop joint! Seriously. You can chow down on gastropub fare while also shopping for dildos, vibrators, cock rings (don’t confuse that with your onion rings—could get dangerous!), and whips. The owner explains, “On Friday and Saturday nights, there are only two things most people want: sex and food. We’re combining them both.” For a restaurant that boasts “Boobs of the Day” on their instagram page (basically, guess which hot server these tits belong to), a burger/sex shop does seem the logical next step. Hooters, take note!

This is either the best or worst idea ever; jury’s still out. In the meantime, if you’re hungry for some of our hot buns, we’ve got the juiciest, most mouthwatering ones you’ll ever sink your teeth into! Give ours a try!

 

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NEWS: What Sex Looks Like Inside an MRI Machine

We have mirrors, cameras, and porn to see what fucking looks like. But have you ever wanted to see what fucking looks like from inside your body? Well, a bold Chinese couple did, so they decided to try fucking inside an MRI machine—all in the name of science, of course! Here’s what it looks like:

When the couple in the x-ray share a passionate kiss, you can see their tongues licking and their hearts pounding in excitement. And when they start to fuck? You can actually see—from the inside—the guy’s cock moving deeply inside his lady’s pussy. And though it’s unfamiliar to see just a woman’s pubic bone being penetrated by just the silhouette of an excited, hard cock, the image is strangely erotic! You can see the woman’s hips moving up and into her man’s cock for even deeper penetration, and you can tell the man is really enjoying it through his clearly excited thrusting. Science is amazing!

We can’t think of many things freakier than getting it on inside an MRI machine, but we’re always open to suggestions! Feel like exploring the miracle that is the human body? We promise you’ll love ours!

 

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