News: Best Brain Booster!

Sex is the source! It’s proven to be the fountain of youth, it’s beneficial for your overall health, it can aid with migraine pain, it feels great, and it’s just fucking awesome! If you can believe it, I have another reason why you should GET YOURS: Professor Barry Komisaruk at Rutgers University carried out a study where he measured the blood flow to the brains of women while they got off, and found out that the BIG O increases activity throughout your entire brain! This is significant because other brain stimulating activities such as crossword puzzles only boost specific areas. I think this means the climax just electrifies everything in your dome piece, so to speak!
Mental exercises increase brain activity but only in relatively localized regions. Orgasm activates the whole. At orgasm we see a tremendous increase in the blood flow (to the brain). It brings all the nutrients and oxygenation to the brain,” he told The Times. Hi people, sex is brain food! Blueberries and your daily dose of fish are essential too but do they taste as good as an orgasm? Maybe this is what the meaning of “I’ll fuck your brains out” means? For the entire article click here.

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NEWS: Titty Time Turns Into Titty Turmoil!

Sometimes when you’re bellied up to a sandbar in Florida enjoying cocktails, the only thing left to do to complete your night is flash your jam jams to the bar! That is exactly what Ronda Beckman did. Beckman took off her shirt and yelled to the crowd “It’s titty time.” I bet you thought she was going to say Miller time! WRONG! 

According to the Huff Post, Beckman served up her flapjacks for the patrons at Captain Jax Sandbar and Grill in Fort Pierce on August 2nd, and refused to cover herself up. According to sources Miss Ronda was out on the dance floor when the cops arrived (obviously) and supposedly called an officer “a piece of shit and an asshole.” You guessed it, Ronda’s solo titty act came to a screeching halt and she was arrested for indecent exposure, lewd lascivious behavior and disorderly intoxication.

It’s sad that Ronda’s titty time ended in jail time. People need to know when to pump the brakes and close the curtain, shows over, you’ve had to many cheap tequila shots, go home…but jail?!

Happy Friday!

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NEWS: Foul Florida Flasher!

In Venice, Florida cops are searching for a flasher that is supposedly trying to make deals with his victims. He offers them cold hard cash and in return he wants to lock lips with their ass cheeks! WTF this guy is a new breed of creepy!

“I’ll give one of you $200 or each of you $100 if you let me kiss your butt,” the note reads, according to WPBF-TV. He went on to write: “If you wave to me, I’ll drop to my knees and play with myself while you watch,” the Herald-Tribune reported. REALLY!? This guy is still on the loose and the Huffington Post did provide a photo of the beast and the note he left for the two women. I find this disheartening, I’ve always thought of streaking/flashing as something funny and light hearted, like scenes in Porky’s or Frank the Tank’s infamous streak in Old School. I hope the Floridian cops find this clown and bring him to justice, no one wants to see his junk or be propositioned for his acts!

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NEWS: Go Green The Sexy Way!

Whether you choose to drive a Prius, recycle, or use eco-friendly sex products you’re helping out the environment. Bravo! French businessman Frederic Donnat owner of Divinextases (a French Firm) launched a natural “erotic cosmetics” line 2 years ago. Donnat noticed a cash cow in the market and went for it! He saw something “more interesting than the usual organic beauty product.”

How amazing! Now you can enjoy the fruits of fucking whilst being conscientious about the planet, Merci Frederic Donnat! Donnat has 8 products currently and is working towards creating 4 new products for next year! According to the Huff Post he has all sorts of naughty organic goodies, “From balms for buttocks left sore by a spanking session to intimate perfumes, all Donnat’s products are made in France with sustainable materials from reputable sources. They use beeswax and shea butter rather than palm oil and all are wrapped in recyclable packaging.” All efforts to preserve our environment are commendable in my eyes, even better when it’s associated with pleasure time toys!

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NEWS: Technology for the bedroom!

Do you think that you’re a champion in bed? Do you bring the noise in the sheets? Well the new app spreadsheets will determine if you’re a dead fish, or guru of love! 

Spreadsheets is a mobile app that monitors your performance in bed to provide statistical and historical feedback. Find out how many thrusts per minute you’re averaging, how long you go for, and exactly how loud it gets. Keep a record of your encounters, date, time, and performance,” according to their website.

This app is so choice! A tool to bring a little humor into the bedroom (which is vital), and who knows maybe you needed to up the ante when it comes to your sexy time skills anyway. Moans and jackhammer thrusts aren’t equivalent to quality lovemaking, however I think a little playful game between two loving adults could spice things up, as long as the game doesn’t get too competitive and feelings get hurt.

Spreadsheets can be used: in bed, in the car, on the couch, in your pocket, on a trampoline, in a hammock (both traditional and banana), at the club, at your in-laws, in a tent, the world is your playground… or your science lab.” I think that Spreadsheets is worth a go, it would be a turn on and just looking at the stats would be motivation station! I’d want to break my current score! Will you be trying spreadsheets?!

Whew! I’m a little hot and bothered now and I think this Benny Bennasi classic is approriate at this time!

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NEWS: Patty Wagon Oral Sex!

What do you do when you’re chained and on your way to the clink? You have some oral sex, obviouslyyyyy! Two inmates Carlisa Brookins and Alexis Garcia were being transported to a Las Vegas jail (along with 8 other prisoners) and decided to engage in some licky licky, sucky sucky. All of the men were seated in a row on one side and the female inmates on the other side. All the jailbirds had restraints around their tummies, so the officer that noticed Brookins bending over to slob on Garcia’s knob was a bit surprised, according to the Las Vegas Sun.

According to a nearby inmate, Jessica Melaerts Garcia told Brookins “I’ll get you off before we hit downtown.” Whatta guy, at least Garcia was going to reciprocate! Damn, those jailbirds really had a hankering to get off. They could have at least waited for a conjugal visit once they hit the slammer! For the full story click here.

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NEWS: Quite Possibly the Best Day of the Year!

Ladies, it’s all about you today. No seriously, it’s International Day of the Female Orgasm! The focus is all on the women today, flick it, lick it, tickle it, pat it, grind it… whatever you have to do to make it happen! We have the lovely country of Brazil to thank for this glorious day of moaning.

According to the Aztecas Noticias the genius idea for this holiday came to life in the northeastern town of Esperantina in Brazil. According to the Huff Post, Councillor of the people decided to dedicate the day to the female orgasm as compensation for the “sexual debt” he owed his own wife.” Ummn hiiii, the Councillor sounds like a man that was sent from the heavens! Brazil truly is a magical country, like you need more reasons to love the place; Giselle Bundchen, Carnival, the rainforest, and men that create international holidays that pay homage to women getting off!

Today the holiday is celebrated in Brazil, Spain, Mexico, Argentina, Peru, and Norway. That is fabulous but I think we should celebrate it in the USA as well. On that note, I hope you all have a toe curling Friday! A few tips of mine for a hearty orgasm:

  1. Send your lover an erotic text this afternoon explaining what you want tonight. Get the ball rolling!
  2. When you get out of work tonight, chill out… take 5/10 minutes to meditate or just zone out, and listen to music. Rid yourself of the day’s stress.
  3. Make sure you have a sexy pair of panties on, better yet don’t wear any.
  4. Greet your partner with a warm smile, and a hearty hug when you reunite on this Friday evening.
  5. When things start to get steamy, just let go, lose your inhibitions, don’t be shy, and make sure to be just as gracious and giving as your partner.
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NEWS: Attention Wheat Free Lovers!

If you happen to be single and on a gluten free diet this news may make your day! GlutenfreeSingles.com is a new online dating site that connects people that have gluten intolerance, suffer from celiac disease, and/or choose to live a gluten free life because they saw how skinny Miley Cyrus got.

I think this is wonderful for the sexual hopefuls that lead gluten free lives and for people that are considering making the diet change. It seems to me like a nice place to network and meet like-minded folks, possibly learn something valuable about your health, find a lover and get some! I’m still not fully sold on dating sites, but hey more and more people are finding love on them. What do you think of GlutenfreeSingles?

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NEWS: Bad for Business!

I would think that if you were orchestrating an orgy you’d keep it on the DL, as much as possible. Scott Pollock, a Bloomington, Minnesota resident wanted to shout it from the rooftops when he decided to put his savvy advertising skills to good use and make business cards for an orgy he was hosting. HELLO Pollock! Soliciting sex is a big no no!

A Manager of a Quality Inn stumbled upon one of Pollock’s business cards in the parking lot that read: ”Scott, Gang Bang Organizer” of “Scotty GB Parties.” Naturally the manager was curious and decided to investigate, and let’s just say the plot thickens:

The manager plugged in the group email listed on the card, and saw that his motel’s address, with a room number, was listed for that night, along with information about the woman involved — “Wendy” — and a suggested $20 donation for participants. The manager called the police to kick the gang-bangers out. When they got there, just before 4 a.m., the officers walked into a full-on gang-bang.”

Pollock, the host with the most, politely asked the cops for $20 at the door. The cops paid their dues, walked in and saw a bunch of people including Wendy getting their orgy on! Scott and Wendy were both arrested. Scott’s insisted the fornicating festival was for Wendy’s 45th birthday! The police should have had some mercy on Scotty-Too-Hotty. The gang-bang was all in the name of Wendy’s birthday, COME ON! For the complete 411 click here.

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NEWS: Fulfilling your fantasy!

Don’t be shy, we all have at least one fantasy, and the moral of this story is fulfill it! Whether it’s role-play or a ménage a trios, most people have an erotic vision that they’d secretly love to become a reality. I won’t lie, I have one. Heck, I have a handful of them!

I came across an article about a book by Tracey Cox Dare: “What Happens When Fantasies Come True” on emandlo.com. Well, forget my new James Patterson book now! I found a new summer read! Emandlo reveals an excerpt that will rev your engines. It explains the value of having fantasies and how they can improve your sexual world. The published piece from Cox’s book is a British women’s account of a lusty fantasy coming to life 32,000 ft in the air. It’s HAWT, grab your hipster-oversized glasses and get your read on:

THE FANTASY

I’m traveling with a work colleague who I have always lusted after. We’re both single and we travel together a lot for business. We get on really well but I’ve never been able to tell if he fancies me or just likes me as a friend. The night before our flight, we were up late schmoozing clients, so we’re both a bit hungover and in silly moods. He looks even hotter than usual because he hasn’t shaved and I love the stubble – his jaw line is square and the stubble just accentuates it. He’s got long, dark eyelashes and gorgeous blue eyes, and every time we work together half of me works while the other fantasizes about the two of us getting it on. We both line up to board the plane and are delighted to find we’ve been bumped up from Business to First-Class. It’s an eight-hour flight and we’re both looking forward to having a glass of wine and then passing out on the flat beds. We settle in, chat a bit, then both start watching movies while enjoying our wine.

In First-Class, there are about a zillion films to choose from and I end up watching an old movie: 8 Mile starring Eminem and Brittany Murphy. There’s an incredibly hot sex scene in it that’s explicit and looks really real, like they’re really having sex, not just acting for the cameras. The combination of the hangover (I’m always up for sex the day after drinking), the wine, the sexy luxury of being in First and my hot colleague sitting next to me, makes me feel really turned on. I surreptitiously play the same sex scene over and over, rewinding and replaying. My colleague is blissfully unaware of my high state of excitement because I’ve angled the screen so he can’t see what I’m watching. (Well, that’s what I think, anyway!) Eventually, I get to the point where I’m desperate for release and it just so happens, I have a small bullet vibrator in my hand luggage. I discreetly get it out of my bag, pocket it and get up out of my seat, smiling at my friend and pointing to the loo to explain where I’m going. He looks at me intently and we lock eyes. I flush. For a moment, it feels like he’s reading my mind and knows exactly what I’m going to the loo to do . . .

As I move through the cabin, I see nearly all the passengers are asleep. Brilliant. I won’t have to rush and won’t be disturbed. The flight attendants are eating their meals and have the curtain pulled back. But I’ve barely had time to pull up my skirt and turn the vibe on, when there’s a discreet knock at the door. What the fuck? Annoyed, I say loudly ‘Someone’s in here’ and am astonished when I hear my work mate say, ‘I know. Let me in.’

My stomach flips and I’m genuinely shocked. What does he want? Is something wrong? I don’t dare hope for what seems obvious: he wants to join in! I get myself together and pocket the vibe. When I open the door he’s standing there with a huge naughty grin on his face. He looks directly into my eyes and says ‘I know what you’re up to. I could see what you were watching. Let me in.’

I’m tipsy enough not to be embarrassed and all those years of pent-up lust render me incapable of resisting him. I reach out with my arm, grab him around the neck and pull him inside. We’re kissing before I’ve even locked the door behind us and it feels glorious. We’re biting each other’s lips and there’s lots of tongue. He starts moving his tongue inside my mouth suggestively, mimicking oral sex, so I push his head down and he immediately moves to my breasts and pulls open my top, sucking and squeezing my nipples. There’s not much room so I end up sitting on the closed loo seat with my skirt hiked up and him kneeling on the floor between my legs. He takes my panties off and then his deliciously slippery tongue is teasing me and I come in about two minutes. He pulls back and looks at me – his face is wet from licking me and he looks so aroused, it makes me crazy. I tell him to stand up then I unzip him and take his lovely erect penis into my mouth. It’s big and thick and exactly as I’d imagined. I’m great at giving head – all of my boyfriends have told me – so he doesn’t last very long either.

The whole thing only takes about five minutes, so when he comes out of the loo, the coast is clear. I wait a few minutes then come out myself. There’s only one guy awake in the cabin and he either didn’t notice both of us missing or didn’t care. Back at our seats, my sexy colleague leans over and gives me a slow, sexy kiss and says ‘I’ve wanted to do that for years.’

If that doesn’t make you want to run to your local Barnes & Nobles I don’t know what will! So in the words of Ludacris… what’s your fantasy?

 

 

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